A Special Request...

 

Dear Family and Friends

In a short time we as a family will embark on an adventure that will take us half way across the world to a different time zone.  A different time Zone to a handsome little boy who unbeknownst to him will become part of our family.  As this occurs we would like to take a moment to outline some request that we have.   

While we would greatly appreciate your help and support we must also have the best interest of Kalyn in our thoughts.  These requests are out of necessity in order to best bond with Kalyn and meet his needs.  Many of you will think these request are very harsh but we assure you that they are meant to help us all undergo a process called “Cocooning” and are not meant to hurt anyone’s feelings.   Cocooning is a process where the parents and children maintain a low status while connecting with the newly adopted child.  This is intended to allow ample time for a connection to take place and to establish the paternal /maternal bond.  Kalyn must know that we are his parents and are going to provide for his needs. 

Imagine being plucked from your current home, town, Country, the food you eat, and the people that understand you.  Now imagine you get dropped off in a foreign country where people eat different, you know no-one, you have no idea where you are, and you cannot understand what people are saying.  While this seems unrealistic and the possibility of this happening is slim, it will be Kalyn’s reality.  Therefore the more cooperation we have from friends and family the sooner we will hopefully be able to assimilate.  Below are our requests:

1.       We will be leaving on January 29^th for China and will be returning to Manhattan Kansas on February 12^th.  While we would love to have family and friends there to greet us when we arrive it will be important to understand that our ability to visit with you will be limited. 

2.       We must fulfill all his needs, therefore we will not allow anyone to hold him or give affection to him.  This unfortunately must include all grandparents, family and close friends. 

3.       While gifts are welcomed they must be given to us.  These gifts will then be given to Kalyn at appropriate times by us.  It is imperative that we give him the gifts so he understands that we are responsible for his needs. 

4.       Visits must be short and sweet.  During a visit if Kalyn approaches you for anything we ask that you resist the urge to assist him.  We ask that you simply point to us and get our attention.  Any break in this can cause a major setback that could take a while to recover from. 

5.       If you feel the urge to help we ask that you help in one of the many ways listed below.

a.       Simple meals: including freezer meals

b.      Transportation of our children if needed.

c.       Gift Cards: Walmart, Target, Dillons, HyVee, etc

d.      Groceries

e.      Lend an ear – I’m sure we will have a lot of exciting things to talk about. 

f.        Pray – Pray for Kalyn’s healing, Pray for patience, understanding, and perseverance.

6.       Know and understand that family outings will be limited.  This will include Church, school events, community events, etc. 

While the above items are just a few of the things we can currently think of we hope you will understand.  We have been very blessed with such a great network of family and friends.  You all have shown us so much love and the love that Kalyn will eventually get to experience from you is just unbelievable.  This has been a 15 month journey that would not have been possible without all your support and prayers.  Watch for upcoming post!!!

 God Bless

As of 1/6/14 we fly to China in 23 DAYS!!!!!!!!!!

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Posted December 25, 2014 (original was deleted--oops!)

Merry Christmas from China! We received some new pictures of Kalyn wearing the new coat and pants we sent him. #so blessed